Everything Is Art

Within seconds of going into the Museum of Art in Little Rock:

[James bounces over to a hanging picture of two boys standing in their underwear]

James [pulling his shirt up and exposing his belly]: "Ricky! Take a picture of me and my brothers!"

Me: "James, put your shirt down! This is a museum!"

[Ricky takes a picture of James, who still has his belly bared to the world]

James: "Jessa, they expect people to do this. It's art."

Me: "I don't know you."

[I walk over to another picture]

James [loudly]: "Hey Jessa! Look at this one!"

[I ignore him]

[James bounds over and tugs at my arm]

James [whispering loudly]: "Jessa! That painting is called 'The Butthole'"

[He points to a hand drawn charcoal piece that is essentially a large circle in the middle of the paper. Kind of like Japan's national flag....if they ran out of red ink]

Me: "Excuse me, random person I just met."

James: "Jessa. Come on. Don't do that.

Me: "I'll acknowledge you when you stop pulling your shirt up in public."

James: "I'm never going to stop."

Me: "Then I don't know you. And my mom taught me about Stranger Danger...so goodbye."

[I walk away. James follows me, bouncing on his toes]

James: "I can already tell this marriage is going to be awkward."