Driving home, a storm was rolling in the distance and James was staring aptly at the distant flashes of lightening.
Me: Sweetie, I have a question.
James: Yes, lovie? Hey loook! Lightening...
Me: Why was the rice in the dryer?
James: Well. It's a long story.
Me: Okay...
James: I wanted to protect it.
Me: You wanted to protect....the rice. So you put it in the...dryer?
James: I bug bombed the house, and I wanted to protect the rice.
Me: So you put it in the DRYER?! The entire bag?!
James: I couldn't think of a better way to keep it safe.
Me: You couldn't close the bag? Or find a clip? OR anything besides putting it in a dryer that isn't air tight?
James: It's air tight. I checked.
Me [closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose]: We have to throw the rice away, sweetie.
James: Jessa. No. Of all the things I would protect the most, I would protect our rice. You know me.
Me: I'm concerned that you would protect rice over...say...me, our car...our legal documents....
James: Our car would be worthless without rice. Ooooohh...thunder and lightening.
The rest of the ride was spent listening to James making farting noises after each flash of lightening and laughing hysterically at his own noise.
In other news...I need to buy more rice.
Or maybe ... buy a new husband? ;-)
ReplyDeleteAlso, your blogs = classic excellence. Can't wait for your first book.
Pahahahaha.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree - when is your first book coming out? I'll be one of the first to buy it.